Vague titles are in vogue

This will be a description of Dan Tasse’s last few days, both practical and creative. In this, the author hopes to instill into the reader a wild sense of how said days went, while providing enough enjoyment for the reader to keep reading. This post may be embarrassingly long. Topics to be covered include:
-effusive joy
-beej’s amish beard
-the ram game
-an odyssey
… so you can skip past the ones you don’t want.

Effusive Joy

So this is where I go “wow, last weekend was great” and explode into internet acronyms. OMG and LOL will make an appearance, as will ROFL. I say ROFL, you say ROLF, let’s call the whole thing off.

But for serious, it was cool. You’ve already seen the list of fun things that happened… let’s see, what didn’t make the list?

1. My parents are awesome, they pretty much let me have whomever over whenever, and also make dinner and brunch. Oh, and make bonfires, and set up sofa beds, and generally make life grand.
2. Cedar Point was cool. I mean, it’s always cool. I hope you all enjoyed the Millennium Force and Top Thrill Dragster, they’re intense but (hopefully) fun. And the Mantis is generally not worth going on ever, I don’t think. Well, we live and learn.
3. Umm… Slug. This game is pure gold. I credit Beej’s amazing sense of humor. If you don’t know what we’re talking about, bring a sleeping bag to school next year… actually, bring one anyway.
4. Poker last night just missed the list- anyway, it happened and it was fun. Taboo was more fun, but poker’s fine. Good to see those kids again- they’re all going back soon!

What was so great about this weekend? I don’t know. I’m really trying to have a lot of these “enjoying this moment” moments. Like I’ve said, I live a pretty fast-paced life (I’m sure you all do too)… so stopping to enjoy a moment is hard, because it means you’re not planning for the next one. I did it a bunch though, shoot, all weekend.

It’s great spending time with the kind of friends where there’s a lot of respect going both ways. Not lip service- obviously you respect all your friends in that way. But real respect, whether you show it or not. My best friends from high school were that way… I had acquaintances, though, where it was not that way. There’s a tone of voice you get, a certain mannerism, that you kind of slip into when talking to that person, and boom, you’ve made a Friend, not just a friend. Because you can have fun with people you don’t respect, and you can respect people you’re not friends with, but whenever you both get a certain maturity about the whole friendship, it’s pretty awesome. I think it took some of my high school friends a lot of years for us to get that far, and with these folks from CMU I’ve met about 1/2 year ago, there it is, that respect. I’m kind of talking around the whole issue; I’ve got buckshot, not a rifle, with describing this, but maybe you understand what I mean.


This is ever a topic of mine, but I recently thought of it when I was discussing with my mom my teeth. They’re not straight, but close, and it would take a lot of work to straighten them AGAIN, after having had braces 3 times. My orthodontist was the kind of guy who was real cutesy (ohh shoot, his assistants were the worst. I’d want to get out of there just so they would stop talking to me!)… also condescending. “You really need to brush more” sort of thing. “Mark down on this chart how often you wear this device, you really need to get 14 hours a day.” Good lord… arms, kicker, or orthodontia?

Anyway, once I got to the Competent Age (I dunno… 14?) I realized what a bag he was, and started hating orthodontia… luckily I was pretty much done. Oh wait, nope, like sophomore year I think, I got some braces again, because they needed me to walk in a circle and power an electromagnet.

But that’s neither here nor there. The point is, she said “Do you ever have speaking problems because of it?” and I said “not because of that.” Then what…? I stutter sometimes. I stutter at work, because it’s awkward talking to those people. I haven’t stuttered ever, until fall ‘04. I just want you to know that I’m aware of it and trying to stop it. Look, I could go on about how it’s caused by my subconscious and I’m really deeply insecure, (and that might be true! who knows?) but what would that accomplish? I am feeling too great to cause myself a bad mood by fretting over occasional stuttering!

Beej’s Amish Beard

The idea: Nobody made fun of Beej’s beard at all until he pointed out that it looks scraggly and Amish. So when you have something like that, or a spot on your pants or something, do you point it out and say “look, I realize this, it’s under control, I’m not totally clueless” or do you not say anything. Because if you point it out, you clear all suspicion that you’re just a slob or anything. However, you might get a Beej’s Amish Beard effect. If you let it go, people might not notice. But they might notice and think you’re slobbish or clueless without telling you what they think. Ideally, someone would call you on it, and you’d entirely clear yourself… but you can’t count on someone to do that all the time.

My stuttering might be a Beej’s Amish Beard effect.


Charity is the greatest gift of wealth. Agree? Well, if you don’t, fine, this point isn’t about charity. I’m saying that spontaneity might be the second-greatest gift of wealth. Money gives you cell phones, non-preordered tickets to stuff, airline tickets, etc. You can do a lot more things if you plan far in advance… but spontaneity is the stuff of youth. Just saying “I am going to do this today” and doing it. If I were a millionaire and I had money to burn, I think I’d just wake up some morning and book a flight to somewhere for that same day. Just go wherever I want. Do whatever I want. Is this selfish? Maybe. Wanting everything right now is selfish. But the spontaneity I’m talking about is breaking free of all your scheduleds, agendas, plans, and throwing a little more Serrano pepper into your life. (about 2x as hot as Jalapeno… Jalapenos are actually quite weak)

The Ram Game

The object is to touch the ground. By the way, I lost the game. This game is great though, especially when played by two skilled competitors. I credit Ram with another unit of awesomeness.

An odyssey

Sleep: I’ll compare them to restaurants.
<6 hours: Like fasting. Can I sleep this little and still get by? Cool, I’m hardcore.
6 hours: the “McDonalds”… eeurgh. Not fun anymore. I just want to sleep.
7 hours: the “TGI Friday’s”… so very mediocre. Leads to a mediocre day.
8 hours: the “Hyland Software Diner”… ordinary, I get these with a pretty good frequency. Surprisingly good sometimes though.
9 hours: the “Chipotle”… awesome. If I had my way, I’d sleep 9 a night.
10 hours: the “Bangkok Balcony”… really nice. Best if you need a little recharge.
11+ hours: an odyssey. I’ll compare it to Morton’s, a steakhouse, actually a chain steakhouse. Probably the best restaurant I’ve ever been at. My dad got a huge gift certificate from work or something, we got these $35 steaks and too many sides to eat. Obviously, I love a “Morton’s”; it’s indulgent. You wake up naturally and still get to keep sleeping. You usually dream like crazy.

I thought I’d have an odyssey tonight… sleep at 8:30. Nope, it’s 10:30. Well a good “niner” will do for me. Tomorrow I could use a small recharge, or even a sleep odyssey. I could use a trip to the “Balcony” of sleep. Hey, by the way, Richard’s on Richards.


chicken -

I guess I could comment like crazy, but I will choose a focal point or two. 1) My orthodontist was ADORABLE. In fact, I had a giant crush on him and convinced myself that I wanted to be an orthodontist (well, and I had a small obsession with perfect teeth– teeth can make or break a mother fucker– and btw, I’ve always thought that yours are quite straight). So he let me come into the office and even put new rubber bands on people’s braces!! Then he moved to Lancaster. Damn.
3) I always call out my own flaws. I think it’s because of the “Ha! They will laugh WITH me instead! Everything’s on the table!” And though that makes one appear to be more confident, I think it actually indicates self-consciousness. It would be nice not to care about those sorts of things. Let them think what they will, etc. Maybe it’s a middle ground, though, because I am able to make fun of myself and not be embarassed, but the thought of being caught off guard is frightening. WHY AM I BLOGGING ON YOUR BLOG!!??!?! I’m sorry.
3) Let me know if you need help on old move in day. I think Joe & Connor will not be there yet? Ionno.
4) Hi Kit Kat!

chicken -

SHIT! 2 3’s!!!

Ram -

What game? How come it’s named after me? I want to play, too.


Brian -

ok, wowza.

  1. the amish beard. this is a problem i often have. let me first point out that i only point it out because while i realize i was the only one of those present that night who cared, i was far from the only one at home. my mom and sister both commented on it and i had planned to trim it, so i just wanted it known this was impossible.

secondly, it opens the door to another courtesy question. i am always the one who says “you have a thing in your teeth” or “there’s a duck on your head” because i have a perpetual fear of not knowing something everyone else knows.

  1. 11+ hours is too much sleep. it just makes me tired again. i think it’s more like Thanksgiving. it’s really delicious, but then you feel fat and you can’t move the rest of the night.

Brian -

oh, and ram, you and i played it at a party once when i had not been a stranger to our russian brothers’ drink of choice. we never called it a game, much less the ram game. if i played it with you, you’d remember.

and dan, that’s why your awesome. i don’t remember who, but i tried to play it with someone once and said someone said “can’t you just touch the ground?” totally missing the point.

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