Pizzeria Uno, and Exercise

Item #1. Pizzeria Uno is now “Uno Chicago Bar and Grill”. The chain that used to be a decent pizza chain is now the same as every other mediocre restaurant. Applebee’s, Max and Erma’s, TGI Friday’s, Ruby Tuesday, Red Robin, Fuddrucker’s, Chili’s, …

The name is the same. The decorations are the same- assorted crap from the crap factory that must exist to produce crap for these kinds of restaurants. The menu’s the same- all sorts of fried shit appetizers, the same dozen sandwiches, the same dozen entrees (served in huge portions), and a bunch of dumb froofy desserts and drinks. Oh, and a couple of salads (read: iceberg lettuce with a couple of cute “theme” toppings) for the “health conscious.” The prices are the same- you will spend about $12-15 including tax/tip. They even have a beer brewed “especially for them!” that’s so bad that our waiter (who was very honest) couldn’t even recommend it. Geez. Everyone who wants to open a restaurant franchise should have to first fill out a questionnaire that says “why do you want to open a soulless food-mart instead of a restaurant with personality?”

Also, Pittsburgh, get places to go after 11pm besides bars!

Item #2. Doesn’t exercise, as it’s become in the modern world, seem so artificial? Like you live your life, except you take an hour out every day to go to the gym, and maybe you run on a treadmill- a machine that lets you expend extra effort to go nowhere. Maybe you lift weights, just so you can put them back down again. Drive your car to the gym to ride a stationary bike. Somewhere in the last hundred years, humanity got so good at survival that we didn’t have to expend physical energy to survive anymore, and so now we just expend physical energy because we have to. What the hell?

And the idea that this would become a chore- like you have to go get your exercise every day. Like “brush my teeth, take a shower, expend energy.” But the alternative- not exercising- is even worse, because then you just get sedentary and lazy. I mean, I guess the real alternative is to find a sport that you really enjoy, and then you’ll just exercise for its own sake.


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