Things you can't blog sometimes

I just posted a thing about the question “are you having fun?" and it made me realize it was a perfect opportunity to post it, because nobody had just asked me “are you having fun?”  If someone had, he/she would think that I was posting particularly in response to him/her, passive-aggressively, on my blog.  I am glad that I remembered to post this now!

I wonder what other thoughts I have that you can’t blog sometimes.  Oh, I know!

The binary “love/not love” thing.  I don’t understand it.  Apparently there is a point when two people are dating that they “fall in love.”  Before that you cannot say the word “love”; after that, you’d better.

I have always been baffled by this.  It seems like a gradual thing, no?  Is it really so ungradual and I’ve always done it wrong?  Or is it truly very gradual but everyone knows the threshold is 70 relationship points?  And why do we have exactly two words, “like” and “love”, and you just have to hope you both cross that arbitrary threshold at about the same time?

Proposal 1. Only one word.  Let’s say “like.”  Nope: romantic types would not appreciate me ditching the word “love.”  Okay, let’s keep the word “love.”  And you can use it every day, with everyone.  Nope again: then your boy/girlfriend is linguistically the same as everyone else.  Okay, how about this, you say “love” to everyone but the longer you say it, the more intense it is.  So you love your friends but you loooove that special someone, and I mean by the time you get married you loooooooooooooooooove him/her.  (this has the added bonus of making a declaration of love into a new bizarre alpen-yodeling ritual.)

Proposal 2. A whole bunch of words!  You catch someone’s eye: “I am intrigued by you.”  You go on a few dates and they’re the best: “I’m infatuated with you.”  You get to know them: “I admire you.”  We could make up some more for the many stages of feelings in between.  “I glipf you,” “I frimble you”, “I prandolate you”, etc.  Keep this up for maybe 30 stages.  By the time you get to “love”, you’ve both probably awkwarded each other out 12 times anyway by skipping a stage too early, so you’re not too fussed.  (the bonus here is making up goofy new words.  and y’know perhaps added emotional introspection as people have to understand what they’re feeling better.  But yeah, new Seussian words.)

At any rate, I am glad I remembered to post this while I’m single, because now I don’t have to have an awkward conversation like: “Dan, you blogged that thing about love and words!  Ha ha!  … but are WE in love???”


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